at vi's house

Vi’s house at about 3 p.m.

“Hi. Sorry I’m late.” I say as I get inside the living room where she’s with Ruby, watching E! Channel.

“Hey! It’s ok. Come on have a seat.” She pats on an empty seat beside her on the plushy sofa. “What happened?” she asks right away. Dang, she always knows when I got problem.

“Nothing.” I lie.

“nothing..” she echoes.

I look at her and she’s looking at the TV.

“Fine! I got into more serious trouble.” I say, admitting.

“And?”

“And I yelled at Mrs. Manson.”

“No way!” her eyes bulge out, she almost drop her jaw too.

“Well, I did.” I say, “and I met this guy in an ice cream shop. And when I saw his eyes and hair, I remembered you!”

“And do you like him?” she leans closer like all the gossipers do.

“Hell no!! we met like 15 mins, that’s all!” I say.

“OH. But he’s cute?” she asks even more.

“Quite. But for real, an ice cream guy! Does a shop keeper not ugly enough?” I say. And we both giggle hysterically.

“Remember what I said to you the other day? Sometimes normal guys are more romantic than those supercilious guys of our school.” She says in a lecturing style.

“Rigghttt…”

Vi walks to the kitchen to fetch a packet of chips and I’m left alone in the living room. The silent living room. The whole house even looks dead.

“So, what is it you want to tell me this morning?” I ask, laying my head on the sofa pillow and take out my cell phone with a notification of ‘1 new message’ on its screen.

“Nothing. Not important.” She walks back with the chips and yoghurt. “Tell me about Ian.”

I stare at my cell disbelievingly. There, Ian sent me a text:

R u completely out of ur mind?

But I like it

I know my mouth’s open and I want to say something but no word comes out. “Who is it?” Vi asks, jump to the sofa and take the cell from my hand. She reads it for a while.

“What is it so special?” she asks plainly.

“I…..I almost got him fired this afternoon! After I yelled at Mrs. Manson, he’d probably got fired!” I say. then as quickly as I can, I text him back:

U r not angry with me? I thought you’d break me up!

So, did Mrs. Manson fire u?

I press ‘send’ and there, the text has been sent. Then only sound heard are just the sound of chips cracking in Vi’s mouth and a very little sound from E!Channel that we don’t listen anymore.

“Does Hayley know about this?” Vi asks.

“I don’t know. Her mum probably has already told her.” I reply.

“Complete story, please..”

And so for 15 minutes I tell her the whole insane story. She gawks at me and stares at me in such incredulity and when I finally stops, my cell beeps. It’s Ian, texting me back.

No. I quited

She looked really pissed. I think I might want to take a break before applying any job.

Where r u?

I miss u…

I smile at the text while Vi is shouting hysterically, “You’re crazy!!!”

Ok, so…I thought Ian mad at me which is not. And I’m now lay at Vi’s bed with Ruby and Vi, gazing at the empty ceiling. “So, are you gonna tell me something?” I ask.

“Not really. You know almost all the information I got.” She says.

“Almost?”

“Well….” She gulps, “almost all. But really the only thing you don’t know is really not important..”

“Such as?”

“Such as…..Sean texted me yesterday…”

“No way!” I gasp.

“Oh yes, he did. And he asked how am I doing? that sort of thing.”

“did you fall in love with him all over again?” I ask, feeling uneasy.

“I don’t know. Somehow, he understands how I feel when I told him what I heard from Mum.” She shrugs.

“You told him?! Gosh! Vi, what happened to you? Are you out of your mind?”

“No, it’s not like that..” she blushes, “…he phoned me too and we talked for quite long. At first, I was ignorant and wanted to hang up the phone as soon as possible. But the more I listened to him, the more I realized…”

“What?” I feel a twinge of alarm. This is all wrong! Sean is supposed to be out there, nowhere, puuffff! Gone!

“He understands me. But really Sugar. We don’t have to a couple again! We can be just friends, right?”

“But……but you and him……but this is all wrong!” I say puzzled.

“This doesn’t have to be wrong. We can always give a second chance, right?” she looks at me in a pleading face.

I silent. No, no, you can’t give Sean another chance. I mean, he had sex with me when he was still with you! And we officially made him a ‘not the guy in our list’, well not in words, but we…..

“Well…” I inhale. “As long as it suits you.” I say, forcing a smile.

“That’s it Sugar! He understands me. He had been here! In my position. Her mum and dad divorce and her mum married again.” She says reassuringly.

“Yeah. Whatever. God knows how many secrets you’ve been hiding from me.” I mumble.

“Sugar! What’s wrong with you? I’ve been open to you, aren’t I?” her voice raises a pitch.

“Yeah. I….pretty much appreciate it.” I say.

“What?” she looks at me.

“Unless, you haven’t told me about the guy in the picture.” I burst.

Damn! I wasn’t supposed to say that! That’s her privacy!

Well, ok, I’ve been curious about it and everything, but that doesn’t mean she must tell me or what, right? Or should she?

“What picture?” she asked, then with a click she adds, “Oh, that one.”

“Yeah. That one.”

“Well, I’ll……didn’t I tell you?” she asks, lying. It’s in her eyes, she’s trying to sound as if she had told me and in case I forgot.

“No. you haven’t.” I say to the point. She sighs and we’re silent for a moment, then she says, “I’ll….I’ll tell you later, ok?”

I was going to say ‘ok’, when suddenly my lips say the other, the other that I might think of, “Does Sean know about, him?”

She suddenly becomes tenser and she gulps.

“He knows, isn’t he?” I say, feeling betrayed all of a sudden. And Vi nods slowly.

And that’s it. I can’t contain this feeling of being betrayed, backstabbed, and not trusted. She’s my best friend, and even before she knows Sean. We’ve been best friends! How could she?

“Ok, that’s it!” I say in a final tone. “maybe Sean can understands you better.” I say, taking my bag and coat then I walk to the door and leave.

As I help mum cut onions before dinner, I can’t help feeling a pang of guilt of what I experienced today. It’s not just about the Vi part, but also about the Mrs. Manson part. Actually, I start to think that I’m out of my mind. Hell knows what happened to me today.

Maybe it’s a jetlag effect? I don’t know.

But still, I still feel betrayed. It’s so disturbing, uneasy, and somehow, it makes me feels insecure every time I think of it. I had been thinking of phoning Vi and apologize when suddenly those feelings appear again and I cancel all the apologizing words.

“What’s wrong?” Mum’s voice disturbs my thoughts. Dang! She always know!

“Nothing.” I say, moving away from her side to the stove, pretend to check the soup and stir it slowly.

“Nothing?” Mum echoes. “Nathan, could you please tell your dad that dinner will be ready in 20 mins so he can take a shower first?” mum shouts from kitchen.

“Got it!” Nathan replies from the living room, where he’s playing his PS2 with Nicho.

“So? Are you gonna tell your story to me, or not?” Mum says, looking at me.

Ok, I can’t avoid her anymore. “Fine.” I say. then, I tell her all that had happened today and she’s quite shock, especially in the “yelling at Mrs. Manson” part and as usual, she gives me advices and parts where I did wrong, including the Vi part. According to Mum, it’s Vi’s choice who she wants to tell the secret to. Sometimes, we want to tell other people, to see how others think, to see from their point of view.

“Yeah, I know Mum. And now, we’re not good. I feel like…” I try to find the word.

“Not trustworthy?” mum helps.

“Yeah, quite like that. It’s as if I’m not trustworthy enough to handle Vi’s secret.” I say, bringing the soup to the dining room, where Nathan and Nicho are ready on their seats.

“What should I do?” I ask, taking a seat opposite the twin.

“Well, for start, you should get rid of those uncomfortable feelings.” She says, spooning the twin beef. “And everything will flow from there. You should trust Vi. You’ve been friends for long time. You should trust yourself and Vi that she doesn’t mean bad things to you.” Mum adds.

“Wow! Looks yummy!” Dad suddenly enters the dining room only with his shorts and sleeveless white thin shirt.

“Dad! I’ve told you not to wear that!” I exclaim.

“Have you?” he asks with a dumb face, then takes a seat besides mum carelessly.

Yeah right. That’s SO my dad.